Self-Care…What is That...and How Much Does It Cost?
BY CHELSEA BROOKS
It has been weeks since you’ve had a good night’s sleep…ate something other than fast food…pampered yourself. You’ve been working overtime. Your family has been stressing you out, or your spouse, or your friends or all the above. Whatever it is that makes you feel good…you haven’t done it in a while! That means you have not engaged in self-care.
What is self-care exactly? The online dictionaries defined self-care as it sounds: “care for oneself.” But more specially, self-care means participating in an activity that elevates your mood and/or emotional well-being.
Online blogs and platforms like Pinterest share: “You cannot pour from any empty cup.” Interpretations of this mantra may vary, but it mostly means to take care of yourself first! You will have a hard time doing things for others if you haven’t done anything for yourself.
Self-care is different for everyone. For me, self-care means something different depending on what I am feeling. If I am feeling “talked out” from my job and spending hours interacting with people, self-care may be a bubble bath and some quiet time with my journal or my Netflix list. When I’ve just had a long week, self-care is meeting up with friends for drinks or a movie with my fiancé curled up on the couch.
Self-care is important because it helps you cope with all the stressors of life in a healthy way. It does not always come naturally to engage in self-care. Furthermore, it is not always natural to engage in POSITIVE self-care. Some people cope with stress through unhealthy means such as stress eating or excessive drinking, possibly because that is all they know. Positive self-care allows you ease stress without doing long-term damage to your physical or mental health.
Maybe you’re reading this and still feel a little lost as to what you need as self-care. Or maybe you’re silently shaming yourself because you know it’s been too long since you’ve done anything for yourself. Know yourself and know what you need. Identify the stressors in your life. Then, identify the things you do that make you feel happy and less-stressed. This could mean doing some soul searching/exploring. You might have to try something new. You can start small by just scheduling a date on your calendar twice a month called: “ME TIME” and for the first two months do something different. Write one time, take a nap another time. Do yoga. Make a list of 5 things you would like to try as self-care. A starter list will be provided later.
Bank Barrier to Self-Care
As is a problem for many of us, money creates limitations to what we can do for our self-care. Some people do not engage in self-care because they don’t think they can afford it, but self-care can be so many things without breaking the bank! We might want to go to specialty workout classes every week, but that’s an extra $150/month that we don’t have. Or maybe we want more money for a “pamper” activity such as a massage, nails, hair or a good line-up.
There are a few ways around this:
GET A SIDE HUSTLE. Do you have a talent that you could make money doing? Cutting hair, freelance writing, babysitting? Something you can do on your own time that may allow you additional income for other things? If so, put some time into growing this hustle so that you can afford the things you like to do. This can also be a type of self-care because you are giving yourself an outlet from your everyday routine.
SEARCH FOR DEALS. I have a membership for specialty fitness classes. I CANNOT afford this on a regular basis! But I purchased a package when classes were 30% off so it would be within budget. Apps like Groupon has great deals on fitness packages, massages and a multitude of other activities. You can search Groupon based on categories such as “health & fitness” or “beauty & spa.” If you are a student, you may have access to discounts for certain activities, so check with your student center! Some jobs also offer discounts on gym memberships or local restaurants. Talk to a supervisor or human resources rep to see what may be offered.
YOUTUBE. YouTube and other social media can provide you with fitness tips and full workout routines for free. You can also get tutorials from YouTube for different hobbies. I’ve studied new languages, photography skills, and guitar skills all via YouTube tutorials.
BUDGET. You want to have a massage this month but you’re barely breaking even. Sit down and look at your budget. Could you eat out two times less this month? Or cook at home more and save your money for a really nice meal? Budget changes can be hard to find when things may already be tight, especially if you are running your own business. Pinpoint one small expense that you could extract. Possibly a monthly subscription service that you aren't using enough. One small change can still make a big difference.
There are plenty of self-care ideas you can do with little or no money.
Here’s a list of 15 ideas to get you started:
Read a Book. An old favorite or a new one you’ve been waiting to try.
Pamper Yourself. Get your nails or hair done. Do it yourself or invite a couple of friends over and pamper each other.
Exercise. Find what form of fitness works for you. Cardio, hiking, swimming, biking, walking, dancing, etc. There is a way to stay active for everyone. Research has shown that exercise can improve overall mood.
Travel. Maybe you can’t afford out of the country trips. But can you take a drive to the neighboring state? Or maybe visit a city within your state? Do you have other friends who can travel in a group to lessen the costs? Maybe just take a drive through your own town until you’re ready to go home.
Write. Maybe you like poetry. Or you could just journal your thoughts. You could create short stories. The possibilities are endless with writing.
Deep Breathing. Find time to try breathing exercises. Slowing your breaths, being mindful of your breathing, can allow you to consciously calm yourself down in times of high stress.
Meditate. Meditation isn’t just for hippies. It can be challenging, but there are tutorials, books, and workshops that can help you find your meditation groove!
Buy Yourself Something Nice! Shopping won’t necessarily help with your budget but maybe there is something small you can purchase for yourself as a treat...that you saved for! A new bubble bath or a new book? Maybe you could go to a thrift store, like Goodwill, for a new outfit at a decent price. Thrift stores in more expensive parts of town usually have new or barely used clothes.
Sleep…Sometimes we need to reset our bodies!
Laugh! Go to a comedy show! Watch a comedy special on Netflix, something to find more reasons to smile!
Positive Affirmations. Some people write on their mirrors, some people put sticky notes around. Fill a jar with positive affirmations and pull one out each day or on particularly hard days. There are also apps that will send you positive affirmations. SHINE is an app that asks for daily check-ins about what you are grateful for and what you will do to “feel good” for the day. Smartphones also have an app called “Daily Quote,” which will send you a quote every day.
Listen to Music. Create different playlists for different occasions. Play nature sounds to calm/center you or maybe some old school hip-hop to pump up your mood.
Draw/Color/Paint. Stick figures may be the best form of art you can create, but if it gives you a sense of peace, why not! You can start with basic pencil and paper, crayons, color pencils or acrylic paint. Another viable option is adult coloring books that usually provide mandalas to color.
Change Your Diet. This doesn’t have to be something drastic, like going from an omnivore to a vegetarian! Start with small changes like one less soda a week or eating one more fruit a week.
Declutter. Some people find solace in cleaning. Take 10 or 15 minutes to clean your mail counter or an area that has piled up with unwanted things.
It is possible to engage in self-care on a regular basis. It is possible to practice self-care without going broke. Find what works for you and be patient until you do. Just make sure you take care of you!
Meet the Writer
Chelsea Brooks is a graduate from the Master of Social Work program at the University of Georgia and currently works with foster children, reunifying families or finding children permanent and stable families. Though social work is her full-time job, writing poetry and performing spoken word are her platforms to make everyone’s voices heard.Chelsea is releasing her first book of poetry entitled “Pieces of Me” in the spring. She plans to launch a blog that is focused on wellness for the mind, body and soul in the spring as well. Some of her current poems can be found on her Instagram at: soulcentered_
